Everyday Conversations on Race for Everyday People

Are Millennials less racist than other generations?

What do people from Africa have in common with African-Americans?

What generation is most in denial about racism?

What’s it like to be the only Black person in your class?

These questions and more are answered on Every Day Conversations on Race. My guests are Mary-Lou Milabu, a millennial black Christian woman, whose family is from Congo, and Sara Bierman a millennial white Jewish woman from California who is also a lesbian.  Both women share their experience and views on race, racism and perspectives on white privilege. 

Mary-Lou shares what it was like to be one of the few Black people in her school and constantly being asked to be the spokesperson for African-Americans. While learning about Black history, a white teacher kept asking her about her family’s history going back to slavery. When Mary-Lou said that was not her family’s history since she was second generation Congolese the teacher kept insisting. She had to school the teacher.

Sara shares what it was like for her growing up on a street where she was the only white kid and learning about racism towards people of color. She shares stories of talking to other white people about race and racism.

This exciting conversation on race with two millennial women, one white and one black will open your eyes to stereotypes, white privilege and racism.

Phyliss Williams co-host of Living the Principles podcast joins Simma to talk about the importance of the principles of Kwanzaa, and how her time in the Marines impacts the good work she does today.

Phyliss shares stories and experiences as an African American woman growing up in the south dealing with racism, and what it’s like to see the racism today across the USA

We talk about the importance of involving family and friends in the race conversation, and having an impact on them.

Topics covered:

• Why it’s essential that people vote
• Selfish reasons why people don’t vote and not voting is a vote against equal rights
• Tactics used today to repress voting particularly in Black neighborhoods
• Parallels between the past and the present in preventing people from voting
• During her time attending a Christian College, she experienced racist dog whistles from other students and racism goes against all the principles of Christianity
• How the Trump administration continues to dehumanize Black people and other people of color, Jewish people, LGBT People and immigrants

What we can do to have the conversation about race, eliminate hate and fear of differences and spread love

• Be mindful of our energy, share resources and support each other
• Remember that the holocaust happened because “nice” people said nothing
• Speak out against gerrymandering which will impact the results of our voting
• Speak up when people are told “go back to your country”
• Listen to the stories of Black people and their experiences with racism, police brutality
• Check assumptions and generalizations
• Think about how different forms of privilege or automatic advantages impact us
• Dismantle stereotypes

In this conversation on race, LeRon talks to Simma about why it’s often draining for him to talk to a lot of white people about race. Simma and LeRon agree that allies are important and that it’s more effective for a white person to talk to another white person about race and racism in order to educate them, and raise their level of understanding. 

LeRon and Simma both believe that you have to go where people are at and not assume they know more than they do. However people need to be called on racist, homophobic, etc. statements. Being an ally and intervening can mean losing friends and even family members who want to hold on to hate. LeRon says he won’t sit with certain family members who insist on making homophobic remarks.

It’s usually more effective for someone to hear about race issues, racism and bias from someone who is more like them in some way. That’s true for LGBTQ and homophobia. A straight person will be less defensive and more open to listen to another straight person.

Other topics are the challenges of talking about race and racism, race and d vegetarianism and whether Chicago pizza is better than New York pizza.

Joel Brown talks about the need to allow people to grow, and the problems that arise when they are not given a chance to change. Racism doesn’t get eliminated by attacking people who want to stop racism but may say the wrong thing. That’s different than someone who is a racist, supports racism and takes actions to perpetuate racism.

Everyone is going to make mistakes. What is the point of having conversations if we can’t do that? Joel says it’s making him tired. While some of these issues are valid, they don’t call for canceling people out. We need to be savvier.

When do we allow benevolence to be a good thing? When the billionaire keynote speaker at Morehouse said he would pay off everyone’s school loans, someone asked on social media “why didn’t they do that for Spelman?”

People are angry, not being heard, and want to be heard. Other people are cosigning because they don’t want the other person to be in pain.

There is a hypersensitivity to issues that have not been addressed. At the same time, there needs to be room for conversation.

The USA has not dealt with its history of racism and slavery. We need to figure it out, or nothing will change. By calling out every single thing someone says, and putting so much energy in shutting people down, we end up not dealing with systemic racism.

It’s easier to deflect from our own issues by making someone else “the enemy” when they are on our side. If we want to eliminate racism, we need more dialogue, conversation and education.

Conversations on race can only happen when people are open to listening, learning and talking.

If we want change, we have to look at manifestations of racism. Ex. At a high school white kids had “thug day,” and dressed up as their stereotype of Black rappers. The white woman who exposed it was getting death threats. More attention needs to be on those issues and why this is going on.

Different issues need to have different consequences. We need to address how egregious is it? What were the intentions? How willing is the person to listen, learn and change?

Joel also says that it’s essential for people of color to learn about each other, that Black people need to learn about Asian people, Asian people need to learn about LatinX people, etc.  Just because people consider themselves a person of color doesn’t mean they understand or have any contact with people from other groups and may have biases about other groups.

There is too much conversation and too many people saying that Democratic candidates for president are not “gay enough” “Black enough” or made a comment 20 years ago. If we want to defeat Trump, we will need to get behind whoever is running. Change and progress don’t happen under repression. Racism, loss of rights, gender inequality only gets worse. Hate crimes go up.

People can create change under a liberal government. It’s up to the people to take power together. Even under Obama, changes like gay marriage happened as a result of people putting pressure.

Increase in tribalism makes it easier for people to be co-opted, particularly white people who are alienated, many of whom are being targeted and recruited by white supremacists.

Solutions

Look at ourselves

What part do we play, what do we need to change about ourselves?

How do I heal myself?

Hold politicians accountable, even those that look like us

Everyone needs to vote- think of the most vulnerable

Have the conversation

Have more conversations on race, real conversations beyond social media

We need to be in the same spaces and think about things differently

See the “other side.” We need to listen and hear the basis for other people’s thinking

People who are privileged have to look at what part they play and look at imbalance

We all have privilege and power in some level and need to share

Recognize when someone is making a good faith effort and be patient and educate

This is different than someone who is an active racist?

Elmer Dixon was born in Chicago and moved to Seattle at age 7 when his father took a job at Boeing. Dixon grew up in Seattle’s Central District, attending Garfield High School. While at Garfield High, Dixon helped organize the school’s Black Student Union in 1968. That same year, with his older brother Aaron Dixon, he co-founded the Seattle Chapter of the Black Panther Party. He served the Chapter as its Field Marshall as well as the Breakfast Program Coordinator. When the Seattle Chapter closed its office and some of its core members moved to Oakland in 1972, Elmer, under parole and unable to move to Oakland, stayed in Seattle and reorganized the Chapter. He worked to sustain the Party’s breakfast program and health clinic, maintaining the Panther organization until 1976 and some programs into the 1980s. Elmer Dixon now works as a diversity consultant.

Originally from Washington, DC, humanitarian, healer, artist and author/illustrator, Wanda K. Whitaker, believes that “the best relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.”  A certified hypnotherapist, visionary artist and Spiritual Life Coach, she currently spends her time working with individuals and groups on changing beliefs and bad habits that are not serving them, conducting workshops on self-awareness, personal growth and development, creating art that educates and advocates and helping to guide others to lead a more holistic lifestyle with spiritual practices.

Her life spans years of community service beginning when she was in her early 20’s in Washington, DC when she co-founded, Inner City Inner Beauty Productions to build self-esteem amongst at-risk youth to serving and volunteering with various nonprofit organizations. She was President of Whitaker & Associates, an events marketing and cause-related consultancy business she started in 1991 and Vice-President of the Board of Directors of Global Exchange, an international human rights organization. Today, she serves on the board of directors of the Create Peace Project.

 She believes her life purpose is to promote brotherhood and awaken people to their higher selves and greatest potential.

Karen Nelson shares journey as a young Black girl growing up in the segregated south to become the Chief Diversity Officer of Appleton, Wisconsin.

She had to overcome the sabotage of her career success early on by a white boss who refused to listen to her ideas because she was a Black woman. Karen went on to become an activist for civil rights and met the white mayor of Appleton who is a strong believer in diversity, inclusion and eliminating racism.

A predominantly white city,  of only 13% people of color, Karen and the mayor have created an environment in Appleton where people across all differences, especially immigrants are welcomed and encouraged to succeed.

This Every Day Conversation on Race demonstrates how just a few people can make a big difference in road to diversity, equity and inclusion in whole community.

David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.

His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.

He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.

In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.

David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.

1- Cultural Difference

2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it

3- Impact of history

Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.

What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.

We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.

Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.

David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.

His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.

He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.

In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.

David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.

1- Cultural Difference

2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it

3- Impact of history

Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.

What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.

We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.

Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.

David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.

His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.

He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.

In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.

David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.

1- Cultural Difference

2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it

3- Impact of history

Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.

What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.

We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.

Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.

Will owning a passport make you less racist?

Lisa Francesca Nand, journalist and travel podcaster shares her experiences traveling the world as a bi-racial women, and how that impacts her worldview, and her career. Lisa is one of the top sports reporters  and travel podcasters in the UK, and in this conversation on race, talks about the impact her work has had on reducing bias.

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In this fascinating conversation on race, John Blake, the CNN reporter who covers race, religion and politics shares his experiences and thoughts on race. You definitely want to hear this episode of ”Every Day Conversations on Race.”

Race has always been an important issue to John Blake. He shares his experience as a biracial young man growing up in West Baltimore where the Freddy Gray riots occurred, and where The Wire was filmed.

Regarding Governor Northam of Virginia, and the issue of Blackface, John refers to Lyndon Johnson and Abraham Lincoln who had racist histories, but later did great things for Black people., “Some of our best friends have been racist,” he wrote in a recent article.

“Thinking about Lincoln and Johnson,” he states “made me ask whether we want someone who works for  Black people who has made mistakes that we can talk to, or someone who is able to successfully hide their racism and do nothing.”

He said that social media will destroy people over one wrong statement and there’s no redemption. “We fixate on other people but not how we all have issues of race. Even I do,” he admits.

We talk about the myth that if there all you need to get rid of racism, is more intermarriage and biracial children.

Listen now if you want to know

• why you can still be racist even if you have people of color in your family or a Black best friend
• what’s whitesplaining and how some white people try to tell Black people what racism
• why John Blake was accused of mansplaining by his wife
• how reporting on gang activity in Los Angeles affected his thinking on race and systems
• what he thinks of Rachel Dolezal
• why we need new ways and language of talking about racism
• actions we can take to look at ourselves, further the conversation on race, and stop racism

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April Baskin,  a Jewish woman of color joined me for an Every Day Conversation on Race to share her perspectives on Judaism, race, the women’s march and social justice.

Her African-American, Native-American and White Ashkenazie Jewish background made her the person she is today, a social activist who has been instrumental in bringing people together across differences. She has had many every day conversations on race, ethnicity, religion, and economic class.

April has a very strong Jewish identity and has held several leadership positions in mainstream Jewish organizations.. Even though she was the VP of Audacious Hospitality at the Union for  Reform Judaism, she has experienced racism within the Jewish community. The false myth that all Jews are white, has sometimes led white Jews to question her Judaism, telling her she is not Jewish enough or interrogating her by asking, “How are you Jewish.” This is a question that white Jewish people are not asked, nor are they told they are not Jewish enough.

There is another false belief amongst some  more right wing  white Jewish people that there is a “special issue” of Black antisemitism. There is some antisemitism and racism in every group particularly when people don’t know each other.  Instead of getting to know individuals in any group, some people take the “easy and lazy” way out and rely on the media, one negative experience or Facebook and Twitter rumors to generalize a group. It’s a cognitive dissonance that when someone in  a group we are part of (racial, cultural, etc.) we see them as on individual but when it’s an individual from another group they represent everyone.

We also discussed her thinking that some of the claims of anti-Semitism are coming from trolls and people who don’t support equality and want to use Jewish people as scapegoats to separate us from Muslims and people of color who have also been targeted and attacked. Their strategy is to make Jewish people feel like they are being attacked by people on the progressive  side and no longer align with them.

This has been particularly problematic in the recent Women’s March, of which April is on the steering committee. In our conversation on race, April spoke about the misconception that the whole leadership of the women’s march was anti Semitic based on the relationship one of the leaders has with Minister Farrakhan who had consistently made anti-Semitic statements.

April made the compared that by saying that if a Jewish person in a synagogue makes a racist statement that doesn’t mean all Jewish people are responsible, and it would be wrong to assume that and condemn all Judaism.

It’s important for April and other Jewish women to be part of the women’s march and educate people who may not know about Judaism and what is considered offensive no matter who they are.  At the same time, it’s important for white women involved in the Women’s March to learn about racism. We need each other and the only way we can be successful and eliminate inequality is by education, experience and working together.

This is why April feels that open, honest and sometimes difficult conversations on race are crucial to stop hate and fear of people who are different.

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Simma Lieberman and LeRon Barton in this episode made a summary of what has been said through 2018 about race and other topics.

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Conversations on Race and LatinX with Bernardo Ferdman and Placida Gallegos

What is LatinX? Bernardo Ferdman, a Jewish Latino, born in Argentina and raised in Puerto Rico, and Placida Gallegos, a Chicana woman define LatinX, and talk about issues of race, skin color, and ethnicity in the Latin culture.

They share issues of skin color, ethnicity and race in the Latino culture.  Placida talks about her family and how being light skinned was valued more than her siblings who were darker, as well as how men had more power and value than women.

Bernardo talk about his experiences as a white Latino who is also Jewish, and what binds LatinX people together.

The Spanish language is gender based, and there are different endings of words based on gender. LatinX includes all genders, ethnicities and skin colors.

Topics of interest:

• LatinX- why, how and impact of the term
• Questions about the term and pushback
• Origin and meaning of the term Chicano
• Colorism in the overall LatinX culture
• Terms that used to be acceptable and is no longer
• Conversations on race within the LatinX community and outside the LatinX community
• Generation differences in the Latino community
• History of Salsa and Caribbean music and new music blends
• Intersections and complexities of Latin culture
• Bad Bunny, Cardi B, and the popularity or Latino reggaeton, and trap music
• Objectification of Latina women
• The racial aspect of immigration issues today in the US
• Patterns of racism in the immigration discussion
• Impact of the media, dehumanization and villification of people from Mexico and countries who are fleeing violence and oppression

[caption id="attachment_988" align="alignleft" width="150"] Bernardo[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_989" align="alignleft" width="150"] Placida Gallegos[/caption]

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Key topics:

Block Chain for Social Justice

Resilient Wellness

Black female entrepreneurship

Racial and economic trauma

Diversity, Equity  and Inclusion in the Block Chain world

Daisy Ozim who grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area and in Lagos, Nigeria, is the founder Resilient Wellness, a co operatively owned healthcare system that provides holistic medicine and health education to marginalized and underserved communities.

She's also the director of Blockchain for Social Justice that uses Block Chain technology to uplift marginalized communities and eliminate poverty and close the wealth gap.

Daisy says it important to talk about race because racism is one of the biggest issues that we're facing in society as a whole.  It’s also important for us to talk about race because we cannot heal or address racism and  all of its manifestations if we don't have a conversation about it.

Her organization Block Chain for social justice is a collaborative organization and that focuses in three key areas,

• Block Chain developer training. Daisy helps people of color and people in lower income communities become block chain developers because they can make $250,000 to $400,000 a year

• Education and access that results in creativity

• Equity in the Block Chain community

Block chain technology can be used for social justice and to help low income and people of color or it can be used to further nefarious goals that hurt people of color.

She wants to ensure that people of color can generate wealth and protect themselves from economic trauma like the Black Wall Street Massacre in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Her public health work helps people physically, mentally and emotionally heal from racial trauma and internalized racism

Guest: Daisy Ozim

[caption id="attachment_965" align="alignleft" width="150"] Daisy Ozim[/caption]

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Dr. Nika White

Dr.Nika White a thought leader in Diversity, Equity and Inclusion talks with me about race in South Carolina and her earliest memories of racism as an African-American woman. This is a very powerful discussion with real solutions.

Keypoints:

In order to have a meaningful conversation on race, across race, we need to be focused on cultural competence as opposed to being  “politically correct.” The emphasis on “political correctness,” hampers openness, listening to each other and can be a barrier to conversations on race and other differences.

There more kinds of privilege that need to be acknowledged and recognized. When privilege is not recognized, it can lead to bias, assumptions and biased behavior. At different times, different privileges are more prominent and have a more profound impact on people’s lives.

The point of talking about privilege is not to create shame or guilt but to have greater clarity in the conversation on race and foster more inclusion. Privilege is about the cards we are dealt that give people an automatic advantage in certain situations. Once we recognize our areas of privilege we can use those privileges to ensure equity and inclusion for everyone.

Diversity has a lot of layers beyond race; age, sexual orientation, socio-economics, etc. that need to be included in the conversation. For some people it’s easier if we begin by talking about the other dimensions and then talk about race.  Everyone must be included. If we don’t address issues of privilege we will not be able to stop racism.

White men can play a key role in change and creating opportunities for everyone else. There are great people of all backgrounds working in the diversity, equity and inclusion realm. It’s not just people of color doing it.

Nika shares a story of being in a meeting when a white man tried to shut her down. Another white man spoke up in support of her. Don’t wait for people who are the targets of biased behavior to say something. Speak up right away. We all need to play a role in building equitable workplaces and communities.

When people don’t see a problem when there is bias, they are perpetuating the problem.

[caption id="attachment_950" align="alignleft" width="150"] Dr. Nika White[/caption]