In this episode of Everyday Conversations on Race, Selena Wilson and LeRon Barton talk with me about “backhanded compliments,” or compulsions to describe, that are actually racist.
To hear more, download this episode of Everyday Conversations on Race for Everyday People
With social media buzzing about Gina Rodriguez, Cardi B, and what it means to be Black, African American and Latina this episode of Everyday Conversation on Race is timely.
If you’re interested in the topic, have an opinion or want to know more, you’ll love this conversation on race with Cessie and Mercedes.
Cessie Alfonso and Mercedes Martin join me to talk about cultural intersectionality and their own Afro-Latina identities. Spanning generations, geography and sexual orientation, they find that diversity, equity and inclusion are more relevant than ever today as more people identify become aware of their own intersections beyond race and ethnicity.
Topics in this episode include:
Bios:
Mercedes Martin is a Cultural Accessory Designer, Entrepreneur, and Educator. She runs a successful African-Diaspora inspired brand called Tres Mercedes- designing embellished sunglasses, hats with African Fabrics, Ancestor candles, and statement piece earrings & rings. She self- identifies as a natural curl hair spiritual Black Woman, but if she gotta be more specific about ethnicity: Black and Afro-Cuban American. Born in California and raised in Oakland.
Part of the Millennial generation she has had her own small business, Tres Mercedes since 2010.
link: www.tresmercedes.com
Instagram: @TresMercedes
Cecilia "Cessie" Alfonso, MSW, ACSW, LCSW, is a nationally recognized expert in forensic social work, domestic violence and organizational development in the area of cultural competence and valuing diversity. She is the founder and president of Alfonso Consultants, Inc. For the past 20 years, Alfonso Consultants, Inc. has provided social work and psychosocial assessments to the clients of civil and criminal attorneys throughout the United States, as well as internationally. As a mitigation specialist, she and her associates have conducted over 700 mitigation investigations since she began providing services.
Ms. Alfonso is a bilingual (Spanish speaking), bicultural (Afro-Puerto Rican-Cuban) social worker who has trained attorneys and professionals to appreciate and integrate into their practices and organizations the ethnic diversity and cultural aspects of their clients' lives. She is also a nationally recognized domestic violence/battered woman's expert who has appeared on national television and British Broadcasting Company (BBC) radio and is one of the few African Americans qualified as an expert in domestic violence in the State of New Jersey. She has conducted training in domestic violence to professionals in the criminal justice system.
Ms. Alfonso has received the National Legal Aid and Defenders Association's (NLADA) Life in the Balance Achievement Award for her pioneering work as a forensic social worker/mitigation specialist. In 2008 she was recognized by Governor Jon S. Corzine of New Jersey as a leading mitigation specialist who significantly contributed to the ultimate abolition of the Death Penalty in the State of New Jersey.
In 1987, Ms. Alfonso, along with her associate, Kathryn Bauer, wrote one of the first articles ever written that details how the social worker skill set can assist criminal attorneys in preparing and presenting the life history of their defendants facing the death penalty. Ms. Alfonso has been qualified as an expert social worker and has testified in the penalty phase of capital cases in states such as Florida, Maryland, Pennsylvania and Kentucky. Her expertise has contributed to criminal defense attorneys obtaining life sentences for their clients.
Ms. Alfonso's ability to educate attorneys on how to engage and defend individuals who are different from themselves in terms of race, class, gender and/or sexual orientation has enabled attorneys to communicate to the jurors why they should give their clients life as opposed to death.
Cecilia " Cessie" Alfonso has received the following awards:
Recognition Award, First President of National Association of Sentencing Advocates and Mitigation Specialists (NASAMS), NASAMS 20th Anniversary Conference, March 2013
Life in the Balance Achievement Award - National Legal Aid and Defenders Association, March 2008
Recognition Award, presented by Governor Corzine of New Jersey - Leading mitigation specialist who significantly contributed to the ultimate abolition of the Death Penalty in the State of New Jersey, 2008
Mim George Award - National Association of Sentencing Advocates (founding member 1995), 2005
Outstanding Faculty Member in the Defender Institute Basic Trial Skills Program - New York State Defenders Association, June 2000
Contact info: cessiealf@aol.com
(518) 928-8199
This week on Everyday Conversations on Race, Simma is joined by Barbara Williams Hardy, former head of Global Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging for a large tech firm, and LeRon Barton a well respected journalist and speaker on the experiences of being a Black man in America. The main theme is Culture Fit Hiring and it’s impact on diversity, equity and inclusion.
They offer their perspectives and answer the questions:
Topics covered include:
Barb Williams Hardy and LeRon Barton
Barbara Williams Hardy is a visionary, innovator, connector, catalyst for change and global citizen of the world. She is an award-winning thought leader with a global mindset and is known as a “Go To” leader who develops high-level relationship alliances that foster inclusion, belonging, collaboration and commitment to align diversity strategies with business objectives to accelerate employee engagement, experience, innovation and organizational success.
Barb grows leaders. She is the former Global Head of Global Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging at NetApp, Leadership speaker and the creator of the Barb List, Principles for Achieving Success and Living an Amazing Life.
Barb’s mission is to unlock the untapped brilliance in all of us.
-------
LeRon L. Barton is a writer from Kansas City, Mo that currently resides in San Francisco, Ca. He has been writing poetry, screenplays, and short stories since he was way young. LeRon’s essays have appeared in Salon, The Good Men Project, Eastbay Express, Those People, AlterNet, SF Bay view, Buzzfeed, Gorilla Convict, and Elephant Journal. His first book, “Straight Dope: A 360 degree look into American drug culture” was released in Feb 2013. LeRon’s new book, “All We Really Need Is Love
Vincent Garrett joins Simma on Everyday Conversations on Race to talk about race, mass incarceration and creating a “prison to school pipeline.”
A former addict and incarcerated felon, Vince has been clean from drugs for over twenty years. He shares his experience of being released from prison, finding a mentor, getting his BA from UC Berkeley and being part of Underground Scholars, a program for the formerly incarcerated.
We talk about race, racism and mass incarceration and the unequal way Black and Brown people and White people are sentenced for the same crimes.
Vincent and his whole family were caught up in the crack epidemic in Oakland. He saw people around him being arrested and sent to prison for a few rocks of crack, while white people and upper income people in the Oakland Hills using powdered cocaine were ignored by law enforcement.
He is now working towards a master’s degree and is the program outreach and retention specialist for Restoring Our Communities (ROC), at Laney College.
Vincent and ROC are working to advance the “Prison to School Pipeline,” to ensure that formerly incarcerated people get what they need excel in college and in life.
Additional topics are:
Zachariah Moreno
Co-Founder & CEO of SquadCast
Zachariah Moreno is a technologist, author, and co-founder of SquadCast. He and his team are on a mission to amplify collaboration, seeking to empower creatives to engage in meaningful conversations without barriers.
All privilege is not the same, nor does all privilege provide equitable access to luxury. There is the economic privilege that comes from having financial resources, wealth and position, and then there is the privilege that comes from being white in America. Racism can negate every other privilege when you’re a person of color in the US. It doesn’t matter how much money you have, what you own or how many employees work for you.
Luis Martin, a brown-skinned Mexican American man and his Dominican husband have enjoyed a lifestyle of economic privilege that few can afford. Luis is a well-known artist in New York whose work has been displayed in galleries across the world.
However, when you’re a person of color, economic privilege has its limits to where you can go. When you’re out in the world, you can still be targeted for your race and experience the inhumanity and hate of racism.
When Luis and his husband bought first-class airline tickets on Delta airlines, they assumed they could access all the benefits that came with those first-class tickets. However, when they tried to enter the first-class lounge like every other first-class passenger, they were barred from entering, and told that people going to Mexico were not allowed.
In this episode, Luis Martin shares his experiences as an artist, a brown skinned Mexican-American and the role that art and culture plays in building consciousness around conversations on race, racism, and justice and equality for everyone
---
Luis Martin is an artist working in Brooklyn, New York. Raised in Los Angeles California, Martin moved to NYC as a teenager. He received a Bachelors in Fine Art from The Fashion Institute of Technology . He has shown nationally and internationally in solo shows and group shows in Europe and Latin America. As a Curator he founded and directed Parenthesis Art Space in Bushwick Brooklyn. Martin has worked with over 100 artists and curating shows that traveled to the Zhou B art center in Chicago and to Miami during Art Basel. Martin has collaborated with brands like Wix, Mont Gay Rum, and Braven, to create art centric programing. Martin has worked as an educator with museum in LA and NY like MOCA, LACMA, El Museo del Barrio and MoMA. In 2018 he was named a rising star of the Other Art Fair by Brooklyn Magazine.Are Millennials less racist than other generations?
What do people from Africa have in common with African-Americans?
What generation is most in denial about racism?
What’s it like to be the only Black person in your class?
These questions and more are answered on Every Day Conversations on Race. My guests are Mary-Lou Milabu, a millennial black Christian woman, whose family is from Congo, and Sara Bierman a millennial white Jewish woman from California who is also a lesbian. Both women share their experience and views on race, racism and perspectives on white privilege.
Mary-Lou shares what it was like to be one of the few Black people in her school and constantly being asked to be the spokesperson for African-Americans. While learning about Black history, a white teacher kept asking her about her family’s history going back to slavery. When Mary-Lou said that was not her family’s history since she was second generation Congolese the teacher kept insisting. She had to school the teacher.
Sara shares what it was like for her growing up on a street where she was the only white kid and learning about racism towards people of color. She shares stories of talking to other white people about race and racism.
This exciting conversation on race with two millennial women, one white and one black will open your eyes to stereotypes, white privilege and racism.
Phyliss Williams co-host of Living the Principles podcast joins Simma to talk about the importance of the principles of Kwanzaa, and how her time in the Marines impacts the good work she does today.
Phyliss shares stories and experiences as an African American woman growing up in the south dealing with racism, and what it’s like to see the racism today across the USA
We talk about the importance of involving family and friends in the race conversation, and having an impact on them.
Topics covered:
What we can do to have the conversation about race, eliminate hate and fear of differences and spread love
In this conversation on race, LeRon talks to Simma about why it’s often draining for him to talk to a lot of white people about race. Simma and LeRon agree that allies are important and that it’s more effective for a white person to talk to another white person about race and racism in order to educate them, and raise their level of understanding.
LeRon and Simma both believe that you have to go where people are at and not assume they know more than they do. However people need to be called on racist, homophobic, etc. statements. Being an ally and intervening can mean losing friends and even family members who want to hold on to hate. LeRon says he won’t sit with certain family members who insist on making homophobic remarks.
It’s usually more effective for someone to hear about race issues, racism and bias from someone who is more like them in some way. That’s true for LGBTQ and homophobia. A straight person will be less defensive and more open to listen to another straight person.
Other topics are the challenges of talking about race and racism, race and d vegetarianism and whether Chicago pizza is better than New York pizza.
Joel Brown talks about the need to allow people to grow, and the problems that arise when they are not given a chance to change. Racism doesn’t get eliminated by attacking people who want to stop racism but may say the wrong thing. That’s different than someone who is a racist, supports racism and takes actions to perpetuate racism.
Everyone is going to make mistakes. What is the point of having conversations if we can’t do that? Joel says it’s making him tired. While some of these issues are valid, they don’t call for canceling people out. We need to be savvier.
When do we allow benevolence to be a good thing? When the billionaire keynote speaker at Morehouse said he would pay off everyone’s school loans, someone asked on social media “why didn’t they do that for Spelman?”
People are angry, not being heard, and want to be heard. Other people are cosigning because they don’t want the other person to be in pain.
There is a hypersensitivity to issues that have not been addressed. At the same time, there needs to be room for conversation.
The USA has not dealt with its history of racism and slavery. We need to figure it out, or nothing will change. By calling out every single thing someone says, and putting so much energy in shutting people down, we end up not dealing with systemic racism.
It’s easier to deflect from our own issues by making someone else “the enemy” when they are on our side. If we want to eliminate racism, we need more dialogue, conversation and education.
Conversations on race can only happen when people are open to listening, learning and talking.
If we want change, we have to look at manifestations of racism. Ex. At a high school white kids had “thug day,” and dressed up as their stereotype of Black rappers. The white woman who exposed it was getting death threats. More attention needs to be on those issues and why this is going on.
Different issues need to have different consequences. We need to address how egregious is it? What were the intentions? How willing is the person to listen, learn and change?
Joel also says that it’s essential for people of color to learn about each other, that Black people need to learn about Asian people, Asian people need to learn about LatinX people, etc. Just because people consider themselves a person of color doesn’t mean they understand or have any contact with people from other groups and may have biases about other groups.
There is too much conversation and too many people saying that Democratic candidates for president are not “gay enough” “Black enough” or made a comment 20 years ago. If we want to defeat Trump, we will need to get behind whoever is running. Change and progress don’t happen under repression. Racism, loss of rights, gender inequality only gets worse. Hate crimes go up.
People can create change under a liberal government. It’s up to the people to take power together. Even under Obama, changes like gay marriage happened as a result of people putting pressure.
Increase in tribalism makes it easier for people to be co-opted, particularly white people who are alienated, many of whom are being targeted and recruited by white supremacists.
Solutions
Look at ourselves
What part do we play, what do we need to change about ourselves?
How do I heal myself?
Hold politicians accountable, even those that look like us
Everyone needs to vote- think of the most vulnerable
Have the conversation
Have more conversations on race, real conversations beyond social media
We need to be in the same spaces and think about things differently
See the “other side.” We need to listen and hear the basis for other people’s thinking
People who are privileged have to look at what part they play and look at imbalance
We all have privilege and power in some level and need to share
Recognize when someone is making a good faith effort and be patient and educate
This is different than someone who is an active racist?
Elmer Dixon was born in Chicago and moved to Seattle at age 7 when his father took a job at Boeing. Dixon grew up in Seattle’s Central District, attending Garfield High School. While at Garfield High, Dixon helped organize the school’s Black Student Union in 1968. That same year, with his older brother Aaron Dixon, he co-founded the Seattle Chapter of the Black Panther Party. He served the Chapter as its Field Marshall as well as the Breakfast Program Coordinator. When the Seattle Chapter closed its office and some of its core members moved to Oakland in 1972, Elmer, under parole and unable to move to Oakland, stayed in Seattle and reorganized the Chapter. He worked to sustain the Party’s breakfast program and health clinic, maintaining the Panther organization until 1976 and some programs into the 1980s. Elmer Dixon now works as a diversity consultant.
Originally from Washington, DC, humanitarian, healer, artist and author/illustrator, Wanda K. Whitaker, believes that “the best relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.” A certified hypnotherapist, visionary artist and Spiritual Life Coach, she currently spends her time working with individuals and groups on changing beliefs and bad habits that are not serving them, conducting workshops on self-awareness, personal growth and development, creating art that educates and advocates and helping to guide others to lead a more holistic lifestyle with spiritual practices.
Her life spans years of community service beginning when she was in her early 20’s in Washington, DC when she co-founded, Inner City Inner Beauty Productions to build self-esteem amongst at-risk youth to serving and volunteering with various nonprofit organizations. She was President of Whitaker & Associates, an events marketing and cause-related consultancy business she started in 1991 and Vice-President of the Board of Directors of Global Exchange, an international human rights organization. Today, she serves on the board of directors of the Create Peace Project.
She believes her life purpose is to promote brotherhood and awaken people to their higher selves and greatest potential.
Karen Nelson shares journey as a young Black girl growing up in the segregated south to become the Chief Diversity Officer of Appleton, Wisconsin.
She had to overcome the sabotage of her career success early on by a white boss who refused to listen to her ideas because she was a Black woman. Karen went on to become an activist for civil rights and met the white mayor of Appleton who is a strong believer in diversity, inclusion and eliminating racism.
A predominantly white city, of only 13% people of color, Karen and the mayor have created an environment in Appleton where people across all differences, especially immigrants are welcomed and encouraged to succeed.
This Every Day Conversation on Race demonstrates how just a few people can make a big difference in road to diversity, equity and inclusion in whole community.
David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.
His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.
He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.
In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.
David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.
1- Cultural Difference
2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it
3- Impact of history
Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.
What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.
We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.
Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.
David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.
His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.
He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.
In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.
David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.
1- Cultural Difference
2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it
3- Impact of history
Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.
What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.
We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.
Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.
David Campt, dialogue thought leader has created the White Ally Toolkit, for white people who want to end racism.
His family was one of three Black families in his neighborhood in Detroit. He talks about class differences amongst Black people and how it impacted him.
He says "instead of being shocked about racial divisions, we need to start changing that." Most white people he's spoken with have very little meaningful interactions with Black people.
In this conversation on race, David calls me on my bias and asks about my awareness and transformation. Listen in if you want to know more.
David offers tips on how to talk about race with people who are different. There are three dimensions to think about when having a conversation on race.
1- Cultural Difference
2- Unconscious bias and the science behind it
3- Impact of history
Some people think unconscious bias exists and history matters. Other people think bias doesn't exist and history matters.
What are the ways we look at each other, and how do we deal with conscious bias too.
We have to talk to people who don't agree with us, don't understand racism and don't see it as a problem. Only talking to people who agree with us on race and racism doesn't bring about the change. White people who are conscious have to get to know and talk to other white people who don't believe that way.
Instead of seeing all white people who voted for Trump as a group, we need to each talk to one person and open their minds.
Will owning a passport make you less racist?
Lisa Francesca Nand, journalist and travel podcaster shares her experiences traveling the world as a bi-racial women, and how that impacts her worldview, and her career. Lisa is one of the top sports reporters and travel podcasters in the UK, and in this conversation on race, talks about the impact her work has had on reducing bias.
In this fascinating conversation on race, John Blake, the CNN reporter who covers race, religion and politics shares his experiences and thoughts on race. You definitely want to hear this episode of ”Every Day Conversations on Race.”
Race has always been an important issue to John Blake. He shares his experience as a biracial young man growing up in West Baltimore where the Freddy Gray riots occurred, and where The Wire was filmed.
Regarding Governor Northam of Virginia, and the issue of Blackface, John refers to Lyndon Johnson and Abraham Lincoln who had racist histories, but later did great things for Black people., “Some of our best friends have been racist,” he wrote in a recent article.
“Thinking about Lincoln and Johnson,” he states “made me ask whether we want someone who works for Black people who has made mistakes that we can talk to, or someone who is able to successfully hide their racism and do nothing.”
He said that social media will destroy people over one wrong statement and there’s no redemption. “We fixate on other people but not how we all have issues of race. Even I do,” he admits.
We talk about the myth that if there all you need to get rid of racism, is more intermarriage and biracial children.
Listen now if you want to know